Letters

Just a short note to share a great resource with you if you do sponsor a child through Compassion International or any other organization.

This last Sunday, was Compassion Sunday and I shared with my congregation the testimonies of two sponsors within our congregation. The video I shared with these interviews emphasized the relationship that develops between sponsor and sponsored child. It is wonderful, inspiring thing but only when it exists.

As I spoke to people after the event, most of the concerns I heard were in regard to writing letters to a child. There were a few people who admitted that they were "a bad sponsor" because they never wrote to their child. I even had one brave person say that they chose not to sponsor a child because they knew they would never write letters.

Let me first give you an "it's okay" hug by telling you two things:

1. You are NOT alone. Just as an experiment I googled: "Compassion International I'm a bad sponsor." Scan through a few of the hits and then breathe a sigh of relief, many sponsors feel that way, including me.
2. You probably are not as bad as you think. When I first started sponsoring Fabiola, I only wrote her when I received letters, that was about once a year. While it is difficult to build a relationship on one letter a year, that was one letter she would not have received otherwise.

You must read Lame Sponsors of the World Unite! by the Gypsy Mama. It's funny, short and very encouraging.

Now that you feel a little less scummy, let me encourage you: letter-writing is not as hard as you think and it is SO valuable.

Start with simply writing a letter every time you receive one, everything you need is right in the envelope. It doesn't have to be a long one and it doesn't have to be incredibly deep. In fact, the simpler it is is, the easier it is to translate and to understand. 

Here is my typical outline for a letter:

• Greeting: Hi, how are you, I hope you and your family are well, thank you for your letter
  Questions:
• Respond to their letter: comment on activities, answer questions, encourage them if they are struggling, comment on the verse or picture they shared with you, comment on their photograph (you're getting so big, beautiful, handsome, I like your shoes, hairbows, etc)
• How was your (Christmas, Easter, birthday, & maybe new year's--stick to christian holidays) 
• How did you celebrate? Did you eat special food or listen to music? Did you have a party at school? Did you get presents? What did you get?
• It is cold/hot here, how is the weather where you are? (Seriously, ask them about the weather!)
• How is school? What are you learning? What is your favorite subject? What is hard for you?
• How is your family? This is a great opportunity to ask the names of the people in their family.
• Personal favorite questions: color, subject in school, song, game, sport, food, season...these are all easy questions and give you a way to respond
• Tell about yourself!!! Talk about your family, your job, schoolwork, even your problems (keep it light!); give your child something to pray about because I guarantee that they are praying for you.
• Close it: I'm praying for you and your family, I love you, I thank God that you are in my life

I usually can only fit about half of this in before I run out of space. It may seem shallow at first but this at least gets you writing and I promise that your child will never complain that you send them shallow letters. Baby steps!

Finally, even if you are not the best sponsor now, or you're afraid to commit to writing a child and failing, please please please don't let that keep you from sponsoring them. Even if you (gulp) never write your child, your sponsorship enables your child to live a life that is filled with encouraging people even if you can't be one of them: volunteers at the Child Development Centers, pastors, and teachers.

And even if you aren't the best sponsor now that doesn't mean that you won't grow. Like I said, when I first started sponsoring Fabiola I wrote her once a year. Now I write two three sponsored children every month. I don't say that to puff myself up because I know there there are some who write to 10 or more kids! I say that to encourage you: take on the challenge, fail at it for a while, and let God teach you how to be be an encouraging, supportive, letter writing master.

I'd like you to meet, Michelle, a very encouraging blogger/Compassion Advocate that I just met.

She blogs at Blogging from the Boonies.

Michelle has eight Compassion correspondent sponsor children in addition to her sponsored child, and she writes them all at least once a month. I was blown away, she's a letter writing wizard! But don't be intimidated, remember: baby steps.

Blogging from the Boonies has a Letter Writing 101 article that I find very encouraging as well as some Letter Writing Tips. Check them out, they're very helpful.

Thanks so much, Michelle!

Compassion also has several encouraging letter-writing articles because, again, we all feel like we're bad sponsors!

• Letter Writing Ideas (this article has over 1800 comments, don't you feel better?)
• There's an OurCompassion group that gets "together" to write letters every month
• Compassion has some great tools about connecting with your child as well (did you know you can email your letters?)

Here's the video I shared this Sunday. Thanks again, Rachel and Darla! 

A Mothering Moment

The second Friday of every month, the OurCompassion Virtual Letter Writing Club encourages sponsors to write to their kids. As I sat down to write Fabiola, Nayeling, and Dieufanette, a few things came to my mind...

In case you're wondering, I don't have any kids of my own. But do have my beautiful Haiti Babies, Fabiola (Compassion) and Dieufanette (World Vision) and Nayeling from Nicaragua (who I get to write to for free!)

Recently I found out that one of my girls didn't pass her final exams for school. This particular girl is always asking for prayer that she would do well on her exams. We talk a lot about school and I'm always trying to be encouraging; I never really considered that she may be having a hard time in school.

It hit me harder than I would have expected when I heard she didn't pass. I felt like I ought to have prayed more and been more sensitive to her struggles, as if I had failed her somehow. I started asking myself questions that I'm sure every mother asks herself but were new to me: Does she have a specific challenge? Is she just not trying hard? Do the teachers understand her? Do they help her? Is she going to believe that she's stupid and give up?

This frightens me because, in the third world, an education is one often the key that releases a child from the prison of poverty.

This is especially difficult for girls who often are denied the same opportunities as their brothers. Teaching any child is deeply empowering, but for a girl who has always been forced to rely or be subject to the men in her life, this is a miracle. Furthermore, while a young girl is in school she has more people in her life protecting her from being abused and victimized. Girls who drop out of school are, in some cases, forced into adulthood without protection.

But this is just the beginning.

When a girl in the third world gets an education several things happen. First, she receives an affirmation that she is worth educating. Secondly, she believes that she is intelligent enough to succeed in school and put that education to a good use. That kind of affirmation of worth and usefulness makes a girl less likely to be forced into an abusive marriage. She is also more likely to teach those same values to her her children and a mother can be the most powerful teacher in a child's life. The United Nations Girls' Education Initiative has some powerful information and resources regarding the education of girls throughout the world.

All of this ran through my head in the 5 seconds after reading her letter.

"What do I do, God? Am I going to lose her?

"I am her Father, I am her Teacher, pray for her. And tell her. Tell her you love her and care about her."

That's it.

If you sponsor a child through any organization, Compassion, World Vision, Samaritan's Purse, Children of the Nations, anywhere, take 10 minutes and write to them today. Ask them about their life: What are their struggles? What are they afraid of? What are they learning in school? There may be a language barrier, but is there any way you can help them? How incredible would it be for you, a stranger an ocean away, to help a small child in poverty with their homework? I admit, that idea makes me a little weepy.

Here are some more letter writing tips.

Do you sponsor a child through any organization? What are some things you struggle with when you write to them? I would love to hear your ideas or even just some sweet stories from their letters.

--Sarah Elizabeth

Compassion: Letter Writing

I must confess that I do not write to Fabiola as much as I ought. I am such an advocate of the importance of prayer and letter writing far above financial sponsorship, that this hurts me deeply. One of the primary reasons that I love Compassion International so much and why I champion their cause is that they advocate relationships. Compassion's sponsorship program is designed to foster a relationship is so much deeper than child-sponsor.

Sponsors have an opportunity to be family.

Your decision to sponsor a child itself carries several implications to that child. First it means that you, a stranger, want them to live a fuller life. Secondly it means that you chose them, whatever your method, out of thousands of other children;

...it means they are special to you and you think they deserve to live.

Many sponored children live in a culture that does not value them, it views them as stupid or a burden. By choosing to sponsor that child, you dispell these lies and it will, quite literally, change the course of their life.

This is tremendous on its own but, as the child grows and continues to live in a world that tells them that they don't matter, that truth slips away. Compassion's local staff members are an amazing blessing to your sponsored child, but, like a teacher, they love them all equally. You, their sponsor, chose them individually.

They need to hear that their sponsor still cares about them.

Here is a great post from a blogger I deeply admire that contains some Letter Writing Tips if you feel like you do not know what to say. If you sponsor a child, write them today. That is not simply a catch phrase, stop what you're doing and write them today. You can even do it online at compassion.com. Also, if you do not sponsor a child and are interested in taking part in this remarkable program, visit Compassion for more information.

That said, I'm now going to sign off so I can actually do it.

--Sarah Elizabeth